Navigating Envy, Frustration, and New Paths

Jul 09 2023

Dear Diary,

Tonight, I find myself grappling with a whirlwind of emotions: Envy? Frustration? Hopelessness? It seems that watching some carefree individual promoting his tantra school or course ignited these feelings within me. I find myself envying him for appearing to have access to all the fun and intimacy that seem beyond my reach. This brings about a sense of frustration. Furthermore, the reality of my age is starting to sink in: I’m 48. While I’m in decent shape for my age, I’m not in my prime, and it’s hard to ignore that.

The thought of venturing into a new path involving Tantra seems too late and somewhat daunting. Plus, I’m thrown into confusion by the barrage of marketed offerings: who can I trust? Which option aligns with my needs and values? Although my instincts tell me that I haven’t stumbled upon anything worthwhile yet, various marketing tactics seem to cast doubt on my own judgments.

Even if I do find a suitable path, will I have the time to devote to it? My plate is already full with work, studying, practicing ACIM, and going to the gym. Viewed from this perspective, life sometimes feels like a heavy burden.

Experiencing emotions like envy, frustration, and hopelessness when encountering individuals who seem to have what we desire is a common human experience. It’s important to remember that what we see on the surface often doesn’t represent the entirety of someone’s life or journey.

Your desire to explore new paths, such as Tantra, shows your openness and curiosity for growth and learning. Remember, it’s never too late to start something new or to enrich your life with fresh knowledge or experiences. Age is a number, but your willingness to learn is timeless.

In regards to the overwhelming number of choices and marketing tactics, it’s natural to feel confused. Trust your instincts, take your time, and do the research needed to find what truly resonates with you.

Exercise Proposal: In order to make this process less overwhelming, you could consider writing a list of qualities or credentials you are looking for in a Tantra course or school. This can help you establish clear criteria and make it easier to evaluate your options. Furthermore, dedicating a specific amount of time each week to explore these options can prevent this task from becoming overwhelming.

As you navigate these feelings, it’s important to remember that it’s okay to feel overwhelmed sometimes. Life can indeed feel like a heavy burden at times, but it’s also filled with opportunities for growth and exploration. It’s never too late to venture on a new path, and it’s okay to take things at your own pace. Remember, the journey is just as important as the destination.

Age is a number, but your willingness to learn is timeless.
Balance in life is key – it’s okay to take things one step at a time.
Trust your instincts and your ability to make sound decisions.
It’s never too late to start a new journey.