Confronting Envy and Redefining Success

Aug 23 2023

Dear Diary,

I guess I’m still struggling with the issue of envy. Not that this came unexpected, but it’s always a little upsetting when the feeling arises. A friend mentioned some guy who’s been successful in his endeavor. For personal reasons, I don’t like the guy. I think he’s “fake”, tells what people want to hear, and “sold his soul for his success”. I don’t like to judge either. But apparently, there are emotions involved. I might be very disappointed, in a way, with how life turned out. I haven’t achieved anything close to my aspirations, don’t have the relationship I wished for, and even in my work, I lack passion nowadays. I might feel like I’m a failure. I try to think more uplifting thoughts, but I actually yearn for “material successes”. On the other hand, I realize that “material successes” mean nothing from a more existential, ethical, human, spiritual point of view.

Your acknowledgment of envy is the first step towards understanding and managing this emotion. Envy can often be a mirror, reflecting our insecurities, unrealized dreams, or feelings of inadequacy. By diving deep into these feelings, you can better understand the root causes of your emotions.

Exercise: Create two lists. In the first one, write down all the material achievements and successes you wish for. In the second list, note down non-material achievements, like personal growth, positive relationships, or spiritual development. Compare these lists and identify where your true priorities lie. This can help in grounding your aspirations in what truly matters to you.

It’s entirely natural to yearn for material success, especially in a world that often measures worth by external achievements. But remember, the true essence of life and its meaning goes beyond the tangible. It’s essential to strike a balance between pursuing material success and nourishing your soul. Embrace every facet of your journey, including the struggles, as they shape and define who you become.

Growth and understanding are as valuable as any material achievement.
Every individual’s journey is unique; comparing can only lead to discontent.
My value is not determined by material success alone.