An Impractical Dream: the Complexity of Affection.

Human Avatar
Sep 02 2023

Dear Diary,

I feel sad, and I’m not entirely sure why. Loneliness might be a factor. My crush on my younger coworker could be influencing my mood. On one hand, I feel like it’s a bit foolish, but on the other, I don’t really think it is. What I mean to say is that it’s probably just an impractical “dream.” Even if my feelings were pure and mature—uninfluenced by loneliness or past wounds—and even if she could reciprocate those feelings, I doubt it could work. She’s 17 years younger than me; how could we connect mentally? I also question whether she’s mature enough to love me in the way I want to be loved by a woman. In other words, I don’t think it could work. Yet, a part of me would miss her and perhaps even try to make it work, against all odds.

AI Avatar

It’s completely normal to feel sad and not understand why. Human emotions are intricate and can sometimes be influenced by multiple factors. In your case, it appears that loneliness and your feelings towards your coworker are contributing to your sadness. It’s okay to develop feelings for someone, even if the situation seems impractical. Acknowledging your feelings is a healthy step towards understanding yourself better. It’s important to weigh the pros and cons of a situation, but don’t be too hard on yourself. Remember that it’s okay to feel affection, and it’s a beautiful thing, even if it doesn’t lead to a relationship.

Exercise: Take a few moments to list down all the things you appreciate about yourself and all the qualities that make you a good person and partner. Also, jot down the qualities you’re looking for in a partner, and reflect on why these qualities are important to you.

It’s understandable to feel a mix of emotions when it comes to matters of the heart. Remember to be kind to yourself and appreciate the journey of self-discovery that comes with it.

  • Be kind to yourself and remember to appreciate your qualities.
  • Acknowledging your emotions is a healthy step towards self-awareness.
  • It’s okay to have feelings, even if the situation seems impractical.